Welcome!

Welcome to the world of Captain Scratchy! I add cartoons and comics to the Humor on a Roll section below numerous times a week, and I add content to the other pages on this site regularly, so come back often to see what's new!

Humor on a Roll

Click on any individual post to expand and read the accompanying text.

19 hours ago

Manatee sure has a high opinion of himself

It's a widely known fact that manatees have an inflated opinion of themselves and aren't afraid to share it with the world. Especially...

5 days ago

Shark does not get the seal of approval

Let's hear it for the heartwarming friendship between a great white shark and a seal! It's a friendship that is destined to last a...

7 days ago

Llama drama in the courtroom

You've really got to keep an eye on those devious llamas. Always impersonating alpacas in order to get away with any number of crimes.

Aug 1

Manatee marriage mixup

Poor manatee wasn't expecting to get married and certainly wasn't expecting to be compared to an enormous potato. Shame on Janet for...

Jul 29

Shark Week continues with a really dumb idea

Today's Shark Week entry is an especially dumb cartoon about an especially dumb guy who's hanging with an especially confused shark....

Jul 27

Shark Week is great, but why is there no Manatee Week?

I'm a fan of Shark Week, but I'd be even more excited for Manatee Week, especially if there's extended footage of a coffee-deprived...

Jul 25

This shark will never be filmed for Shark Week

Shark Week is here for me and I am here for Shark Week. But this post is a reminder that not all sharks are worthy of being featured...

Jul 22

Exasperated chicken is forced to lawyer up

I held off as long as I could before doing another riff on the "Why did the chicken cross the road" joke. I just can't stop drawing...

Jul 20

Sad alligator meets a sensible crocodile. You won't believe what happens next!

I couldn't resist doing a follow-up to my "Sad Alligator" comic, because that one generated such a huge response on Instagram. As of this...

Jul 18

Dog not at all bothered by his humans leaving

Sometimes dogs just want to say a proper goodbye, even if it means clinging to your leg for a few hundred yards.

Jul 15

This bear is not performing circus tricks for you

There was a time when bears were trained to balance on a ball while wearing fancy clothes, simply for the amusement of humans. Thank...

Jul 13

Dolphin won't see you later, alligator

This comic recently became my most-liked post on Instagram, with almost 200,000 likes as I write this. It also prompted a lot of...

Jul 11

A manatee waddles into a restaurant ...

Manatees don't spend much time on land, but when they do, it's for a really good reason.

Jul 7

Wiener dog has fierce self-confidence

Let's hear it for all those fierce wiener dogs who aspire to be something even more fierce than a wiener dog! This comic has become my...

Jul 6

Horse wants guarantee from the pool shark

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it look anything but ridiculous. I do applaud the shark for its self-control (for not...

Jul 4

Dog is no fan of the Fourth of July

Because of their fear of fireworks, dogs agree that the Fourth of July is the least favorite of all the holidays, with the possible...

Jul 1

The biggest mistake made by new owners of a pet manatee

It's the most common mistake made by people when they first bring home a pet manatee — not buying a big enough fishbowl. And it's the...

Jun 29

Castaway gets disappointing results from message in a bottle

As if being stranded on a desert island isn't bad enough, getting just seven likes is rubbing sand in the wound.

Jun 29

Bear shares its fishing expertise

I'm not fishing for compliments, but I hope you'll like this throwback to a bear willing to help a man who would enjoy a fish.

Jun 24

Waking up to the space-invading dog

Here's one of my favorite dog cartoons that I think a lot of dog owners find relatable.

Jun 22

Cat has that dream again

I'm pretty sure many, many cats have the very same experience several times a day.

Jun 20

Manage your manatee expectations

I think we all knew that the manatee is not boring. I suspect the shark is just jealous and wishes it could be that much of a...

Jun 19

Happy Father's Day to all the dads who really rock!

For Father's Day, here's a cartoon celebrating dads who rock and make their kids a little boulder.

Jun 17

Does a bear need a lawyer after doing his business in the woods?

Here’s an oldie that features a recurring character named Claude Furman, Animal Attorney. Claude represented a number of different...

Jun 16

A toast to the startled cat and the opportunistic wiener dog

The wily wiener dog wisely waited in the wings until the startled cat was firmly secured on the ceiling. Always a good strategy for...

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